Shalom Existence

Last night I stayed up until 4:30 am. I don’t do that anymore. Tonight I am so tired sleep is evading me for some unknown reason. So I am thinking about what God has done for me, and as Andy reminded me today, we have to watch out that we’re not discounting and forgetting everything that we do have.

Oh MY GOSH…side note, I just changed the channel on the TV and realized it is only 11:40 something. I SERIOUSLY thought it was like 2 in the morning. Wow. I do not feel as bad now.

Ok, on to the important. I have still been stressing about the financial strain my accident is causing. So, to continue on- I am selfish. I am upset about money that I have to spend that I have. But at least I have it. At least I am not getting sued and I am not hurt, nor did I injure anyone. I mean, it was a parked car!

Also, I am thinking about Haiti and the food crisis and the jacked up prices on everything and why the top gets the profit and the big companies can use child labor and still get our money and the middle men feel they have to for their quality of life and the poor get the leftovers, which isn’t much, and how the problem in many parts of the world is even more severe than here, and why we consider ourselves Americans when we’re all God’s children, and how the kids I taught today are so sweet and when I asked them what God has promised them (we were talking about Noah and the rainbow) one of them drew a gameboy and another drew their parents and wondering what we are doing to our children and thankful that some of them are still innocent and glad that there are reminders of good out there and who God is for those of us who struggle with self or worldly wants, even at a young age. So, I am glad that I am there to teach them, even for a short time, and I am thankful that there are others willing to pour into kids and anyone who really wants to follow Jesus and it’s also cool to see those following Jesus that really just want to love people no matter what and pour into whoever may cross their paths and that one day I might not look at myself and say I’m white and native “American” speaking so it’s hard for people to trust me (I really really do have a heart for immigrants) AND this is all I think about when I try to sleep and am so tired.

Eyes burning now.

Jesus thank you!! Thank you for loving me and giving me thoughts and passions and help me show to others every day. I know it is going to take some work, but I admit I need it. Thanks for loving us all so much. Amen and Amen. Sorry Jesus, I was raised Pentecostal. It seemed appropriate.

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