Life's little blessings (literally and sarcastically)
This week Andy and I have gotten good news on nearly every front. I am so excited to say that it seems life is moving forward just in time for baby. So…thank God for this week.
However, I wish that I felt that I knew what I was doing. I know it is only going to get worse. Everyday I read something else that makes me go WHAT??? No one tells you that happens after birth. Apparently the world keeps many secrets in order for people to pro-create. Then, just as you are about to enjoy the “miracle of birth” you discover just what lies in store. For anyone out there that doesn’t want to know and wants to continue on in their happy bubble, I completely understand. For anyone else… keep reading.
- Leakage- occurs grossly for the day after birth (as in “Oh honey make sure you bring 3 extra pairs of socks because it might run down your legs.”)
- Soreness- breasts, down there, all that…for about 10 days. Apparently this is how long it takes to acclimate to breastfeeding. Umm….I thought it was supposed to be natural?!?!
- Hemorrhoids- you’re about one billion times more likely to get these after you give birth. I don’t need to explain them. If you don’t know exactly what they are google them. NO thank you!
- Clots- Bleeding occurs for 1-2 weeks after. During this time you might pass clots. One healthy pregnancy mag commented “may be painful and as big as a plum.” What the— No comment.
- Weight- yeah, yeah, yeah. Everyone knows about this one. But it’s still unfair. No one likes cellulite. No one. Not even chubby chasers.
Get the concern? These are only the mild wowsers that I learned. I left out more explicit ones for fear of losing 3 of my 4 readers (thanks for being a constant baby). I will be sure to let all my friends who desire to know the real truths about child bearing in the days after.
Are you already a mom? Do you agree or disagree? This is all merely hearsay right now. Give me two more months!
Popularity: 2% [?]
Not laughing at your impending pain, but you gave Ria and I quite the chuckle here
.
Ria says….”if your baby has a good “lock”, the breast pain will outweigh them all”…..also, she says, “yes, passing clots is nasty….getting them down the toilet is even more fun”
There ya have it….Loads of encouragement from the Keathley family
.
Okay well having had a c-section, they cleaned me out pretty good…so my bleeding, although heavy, wasn’t nearly as bad as I hear it could have been…but yeah. Those clots are…WOW! It felt like I was losing my insides the first time I sat on the toilet. Even though I had a c-section – the first time pooping was like, CRAZY painful! I was too afraid! In fact, they wouldn’t even give me anything other than a liquid diet until I passed gas. Then after I passed gas they would give me a soft diet until I pooped. I got my first experience with a suppository…I made the lady give it to me because I wanted to eat something so bad and they wouldn’t give me anything until I pooped!!!
The breast pain was HORRENDOUS. Even more so when I had a blocked milk duct. My breast was swollen and red and hot to the touch and the only pain that was worse than that was from my surgery…
Oh yeah, and laying in bed having someone else change your pad…and having someone else have to use a water bottle thing to clean you when you use the bathroom because it hurts too bad to wipe…it’s disgusting.
Honestly, I’m glad my mom was with me, because I couldn’t imagine having my husband see that. It was soooooo gross!!!!!!
XOXO
LOL….I had c-sections both times, and it really sucked! Okay not having 4 days of labor the 2nd time was better but still. My first baby wouldn’t latch and the 2nd baby I swear she was trying to cut teeth the first week (that is how it felt!)
The clots were really bad too..so glad we are done having babies!
Wow. Can’t wait… Lol. My friend Megan already told me that my pregnancy was a good birth control for her! Remembering all the things ppl don’t talk about, she was like, nope, I don’t need baby #4!! Ha.
No, it’s not the world keeping secrets – it’s just the post-pregnancy amnesia that settles in a few weeks after baby is born. (Probably related to the whole sleep-deprivation thing!) I seriously have not thought of all that post-partum nastiness since leaving the hospital. My advice? When they offer you Ibuprofen or Vicodin, PICK VICODIN! Then, after a week, have your husband through out the extras, and get off that lovely, sanity-saving drug.
ok. Note to self. Make my wife take vicodin. That sounds fine by me!
haha.
I probably coulda tried to not read this.. but I did. and now it’s too late.
Now on top of everything that I’ve already been freaking out about, I have to think about this too.
Ahh parenthood… can’t wait.
I agree with Jenny!!!