Shalom Existence

All this flashy rhetoric about loving you.

I never had a selfless thought since I was born.

I am mercenary and self-seeking through and through;

I want God, you, all friends, merely to serve my turn.

 

Peace, reassurance, pleasure, are the goals I seek.

I cannot crawl one inch outside my proper skin;

I talk of love- a scholar’s parrot may talk Greek-

But, self-imprisoned, always and where I begin.

- C.S. Lewis

This was one of the first pieces I read that made me hang my head in shame and remember that only through God’s love am I of good to others. Only through his love can I break through my only selfish habits and desires.

As I was watching FNN last night I saw a commercial about Al Gore and his “ungreen” habits. The promo detailed his home rennovations, boat, as well as other small things that he has been photographed with that are not particuarly environmentally friendly. For about 3 seconds I was outraged, shocked, saddened. Then it sank in, we all do it. Know the truth, know we should be good stewards of everything God has given us (including the planet), but then our own selfishness seeps in and we cease to be the good that God’s image sets in us and begin to be merely human. Because you see, God does something supernatural in us. And without him we are going to go buy the big boats and mansions (whatever that may be in our own life), simply because that makes us feel good. The selfishness, the simple immediate gratification (stupid id) that actually drives us away from God.

So, as I read this, I try to remember who I really am, without my Father, and how single-minded (and “ungreen”) I can become. And I draw close to Him.

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